I Dont Know But I Think Maybe

I was browsing through some blogs of my friends, particularly those whom I haven't had much contact with since high school.

Compared to most of them, my blog long outlasted theirs. In fact most of theirs died circa high school. Clicked on some links to blogs I used to read. People whom I used to envy, maybe wished I was, that sort. Needless to say, they've all moved on too, to where I dont know.

Then it struck me. Although most of my blogging life has been spent outside high school, the time most spent on it, was back then. All those countless late nights blogging, html editing, reading other ones. The iconic, memorable times, all back then.

And so I figured perhaps my lack of faith these days here is proly some subconscious way to slowly detach myself from that part of my life. Not that anything bad happened, but I don't forget things easily and I still dwell on things that I shouldn't, pretty frequently.

I guess its just my way of slowly 'letting go'..

And somehow I dont know whether a new blog would make me feel any better or give me that 'fresh start' feeling. I really dont think so.

Between lettings go and promising myself I wouldn't let this die, like how many others have, I just dont know.

In the midst of all this however, my iTunes is playing. And its playing songs which have certain meanings attached to them from that time. In order too. Its almost reading my mind. Feeling poignant.

And as I struggle to figure out how relevant this is in my life anymore, I fear it may be a long time before I figure the answer out; that is if I ever do. But between ever and anon, then this could be an end.

And I hope this isn't.

This entry was posted by Riz, on Wednesday, November 17, 2010. Say Something.